Picnic at Asgard (short story)

Picnic at Asgard was a short story published in The Legends of River Song. It elaborated on River Song's mention in her debut appearance of having had "a picnic at Asgard" with the Doctor at some point in her past, revealing that she had shared this particular adventure with the Eleventh Doctor — although Steven Moffat's novelisation of The Day of the Doctor later implied that it had been the tenth.

Summary
River trades ninety-five sugar mice that arrived 4,600 years past their sell-by date and an incredibly rare and protective holy relic sent to her by Father Octavian years before for a Time Hopper from another Stormcage inmate named Frodene. Using the Time Hopper, River travels back to before her jail cell was completed and escapes to meet up with the Doctor for a date on Asgard, a planet-sized theme park. While the two initially enjoy themselves, a mechanical dragon suddenly malfunctions, forcing the Doctor and River to rescue a young boy named Mure. The encounter with Mure makes River think about her own desire to have a child and she ponders whether she should ask the Doctor his thoughts on her having a baby. However, she fears the Doctor may laugh at her or that he may feel pressured to have a baby with her. The Doctor puts a helmet on her head and distracts her from her thoughts before she can decide whether or not to ask his advice.

The Doctor and River then visit the Command Center, where the Park Director Caius Roose insists it was a minor malfunction, but a security officer named Postumus Fearne believes it wasn't. Following Postumus' directions, the two head for the dining hall at Valhalla and used the park's subway system to sneak around undetected. Encountering Postumus again, River learns that the dimensional calibrator for the dining hall had been messed with, causing the dimensions to start to fold in on themselves, which would inevitably be fatal for those inside the hall. River and the Doctor lead the Valkyries in rescuing the diners from the dining hall and the Doctor demands to know which of the diners messed with the dimensional calibrator. One makes a break for it, but River catches the culprit, a fifteen-year-old boy named Tomith who had hacked the security system just to mess around and didn't intend any harm. While Caius initially intended to have Tomith executed for his crime as per the law, the Doctor convinces him to spare Tomith and instead gives him a job fixing Asgard's security problems, and passes off the incident as a major test of the park's security systems. Afterwards, the Doctor gives Mure a blunted sword that shoots tiny fireworks and Postumus keeps the emptied park open for the two of them alone, allowing them to have a picnic and enjoy the park's attractions. River chooses to leave her desire of motherhood to fate and not ask the Doctor's opinion. He eventually returns her to Stormcage undetected.

Characters

 * River Song
 * Eleventh Doctor
 * Tomith
 * Mure
 * Mure's Mother
 * Caius Roose
 * Postumus Fearne
 * Calinth
 * Tullus

Continuity

 * River and Flemming mentioned the picnic at Asgard recorded in River's diary. (TV: Silence in the Library, The Husbands of River Song)
 * River wants to have a child. After her death, she becomes a pseudo mother to CAL, Ella, and Joshua. (TV: Forest of the Dead)
 * River tells the Doctor she doesn't want to give him her sword because she likes it. As the Lone Centurion, her father's weapon of choice was a sword. (TV: The Pandorica Opens / The Big Bang, A Good Man Goes to War) Her mother also had a knack for swordsmanship. (TV: The Curse of the Black Spot)
 * River refers to being labeled a psychopath. (TV: Let's Kill Hitler, The Wedding of River Song)
 * River notes that the Doctor gets younger as she meets him while she's getting older. (TV: The Wedding of River Song)