UPVC (short story)

uPVC was the fifteenth short story in the Short Trips anthology More Short Trips. It was written by Paul Farnsworth. It featured the Second Doctor with Jamie McCrimmon and Zoe Herriot, and the Seventh Doctor with Ace.

Summary
The TARDIS is in flight and Jamie is alone in the console room. He hears a banging outside the doors, but when the Doctor and Zoe enter, he can't convince them he heard something. The noise sounds again, and the Doctor realises it is someone knocking on the TARDIS. He even hears a man's voice outside.

The Doctor opens the doors and lets the man in. He introduces himself as Bill Rigby, and he sells windows — with double glazing. He tries to convince the TARDIS crew to buy some windows, even giving them leaflets, but the Doctor bundles him out of the TARDIS, back into the Vortex.

Bill has left his umbrella behind, and as Jamie begins to put it into the cupboard, Bill climbs out of the cupboard. He continues his sales pitch, mostly on deaf ears, until he mentions "your choice of view". When the travellers realise they could have any view out of the window, they ask for more information...

Several incarnations later, Ace is wandering the TARDIS corridors, bored. She comes across a door that is padlocked, and decides to break in. The Doctor appears, and is very angry with her. She leaves, chastened, while the Doctor enters the room. It is empty except for a window. The window shows a view of the Doctor's childhood home. He decides that he needs to permanently seal the room.

Part I

 * Second Doctor
 * Jamie
 * Zoe
 * Bill Rigby

Part II

 * Seventh Doctor
 * Ace

Worldbuilding

 * The salesman mentions the Virgo Mountains on the planet Mitak as one of the possible views.
 * The Doctor reminisces about his home on Gallifrey.

Continuity

 * When the Doctor prepares to open the TARDIS doors, Jamie mentions when Salamander did the same thing in flight. (TV: The Enemy of the World)
 * The Doctor orders a mock Georgian window looking out at his home on Gallifrey. He returns to his home in PROSE: Lungbarrow.