The Origin of Doctor Who Magazine (comic story)

The Origin of Doctor Who Magazine was the sixty-fifth, special full-page edition of The Daft Dimension, published in DWM 544 in honour of Doctor Who Magazine's 40th anniversary. Eschewing the usual modus operandi of Daft Dimension (which would set its mini-stories in a parodical version of the Doctor Who universe), The Origin of Doctor Who Magazine presented an equally-unserious look at the inception of Doctor Who Magazine itself in the real world, giving no clear sign of being set in a universe where the Doctor really existed.

Synopsis
1979. Discovering that Televisual Comic has lost the licence to publish Doctor Who comics, Dez Skinn intends to bring the adventures of the Time Lord from Gallifrey to the Mighty Marvel UK. But after he sleeps on the idea and starts pitching it to various high-ups, none of them really seem to "get it"…

Plot
1979. Reading an issue of rival comic Televisual Comic, Marvel UK employee Dez Skinn confirms that they are no longer publishing a Doctor Who strip, and concludes that "t'licence must be up for grabs". He goes to bed intent on sleeping on it and doing something about it in the morrow.

When the morning comes, Stan Lee flies in for a meeting. All smiles and little understanding, Lee, shown a picture of the Fourth Doctor by Skinn, assumes that the Doctor is a superhero of some sort, and demands to know what his superpowers are. A baffled Skinn answers that he has no powers as such, save the ability to regenerate, like all Time Lords. Lee draws the mistaken conclusion that the Doctor is defined as an "alien shapeshifter" and sets the ball rolling. Right there and then, Lee comes up with a proof-of-concept issue of Timelord, where the character is retooled into "Timelord, a doctor by day who becomes an avenging superhero thanks to his sonic sceptre! Excelsior!".

Mumbling that Marvel "just doesn't get it", Skinn takes his pitch to another publishing company, his "old pals" at Wayfleet Publications. Unfortunately, Colonel Lionel Bluster-Outrage, the head of Wayfleet, cannot conceive of a "serious" comic-book that's not about either football or war, and thus insists on making "Dr Who" into Sergeant Who. Skinn's protests that the Doctor is more likely to offer his enemies a jelly baby convince Colonel Bluster-Outrage that the prospective comic should be geared towards pre-schoolers, leading to the creation of Sergeant Who's Jelly Baby Adventures.

The horrified Dez Skinn wakes up in a cold sweat and realises both hellish pitches were only nightmares and it's still early in the morning. Cautioned by his bad dreams, he puts together a dummy issue himself, takes it straight to the BBC, and, once approval is granted, goes to announce the imminent debut of Doctor Who Weekly at the nearest comics convention. Unfortunately, the Marvel fans in attendance can only ask whether the Doctor could beat the Hulk, if the Doctor will join the the Avengers, and what his superpowers are.

Characters

 * Dez Skinn
 * Stan Lee
 * Colonel Lionel Bluster-Outrage
 * Timelord
 * Sergeant Who

Story notes

 * Dez Skinn was in fact the founding editor of Doctor Who Magazine, then Doctor Who Weekly.
 * Televisual Comic is a comedic way of referring to TV Comic.