Year of the Pig (audio story)

 was the ninetieth story in Big Finish's monthly range. It was written by Matthew Sweet and featured Colin Baker as the Sixth Doctor and Nicola Bryant as Peri Brown.

This story features a full cast of Doctor Who alumni, including Adjoa Andoh, Michael Keating and Maureen O'Brien.

Publisher's summary
Ostend, 1913. War is coming. A war in which millions will die. And the guest in suite 139 of the Hotel Palace Thermae knows it. Which is odd, considering he has trotters, a snout and a lovely curly tail.

Toby the Sapient Pig is a swine on the run. Two peculiar strangers have been hunting him across Europe. The first, Miss Alice Bultitude, is an Englishwoman and collector of obscure theatrical ephemera. The second, Inspector Alphonse Chardalot, is a celebrated member of the detective police - the man who brought the trunk murderess of St Germain to justice.

This was supposed to be a reading week for the Doctor and Peri. Now they must do battle with a villain who wants to wipe every last human from the face of the earth - once he's had just another dish of truffles. And maybe a valedictory glass of fizzy lemonade.

Part one
In 1913 Ostend, the Doctor falls asleep reading À la recherche du temps perdu on the beach and is awoken by Miss Bultitude, but their one-sided conversation is interrupted when the Doctor has to save the life of the drowning Inspector Chardalot. Peri, who has been shopping for a postcard to send to H. G. Wells, returns and gives Chardalot mouth-to-mouth, after which she and the Doctor head back to their room at the Hotel Palace Thermae with a stuffed rhesus macaque in bridal gear anonymously left for Peri with a note of thanks at reception. They soon receive a dinner invitation from Chardalot.

At dinner, Miss Bultitude says that she recognised the rhesus macaque as one from a shop run by James Ensor's mother and takes Peri to the terrace when Chardalot lights a cigar. In their absence, Chardalot asks the Doctor about the TARDIS, which Peri has been seen entering and leaving, and claims that he has come to investigate a murder that is yet to happen. Miss Bultitude claims to know that some of his stories of solving crimes are untrue and believes that he is a con artist as she saw him leaving the macaque at reception prior to his supposed near-drowning. She is also suspicious as his visit coincides with that of another guest whom she intends to introduce Peri to.

Peri declines Chardalot's invitation for her and the Doctor to join him in a walk on the promenade and they help Miss Bultitude get to her room when she claims to be feeling ill, but she admits once upstairs that she is not staying at the hotel and leads them to the room of Toby the Sapient Pig, a former star of the freakshow whom she has been following around Europe in the hopes of meeting him as part of her research for a book she is writing. Toby is afraid of the Doctor and has Nurse Albertine stun his three visitors with a memory-wiping weapon similar to a cattle prod. He keeps the Doctor and Miss Bultitude in his room whilst Nurse Albertine claims to have found Peri at the bottom of the linen chute, leading Chardalot to begin a search for the missing pair.

Chardalot confesses to Peri that the drowning rescue was a ruse inspired by The Woman in White to engender trust and claims that he is on the trail of a criminal with a memory weapon which he has used against him several times and which he correctly deduces has been used on her and the Doctor. Peri joins him in searching Miss Bultitude's room as he believes her to be an accomplice and they find a note apparently from Toby inviting Miss Bultitude to meet with him in the hammam, one which they believe to have been forged. They find Albertine listening at the door and Peri agrees to go for a walk with her on the promenade, but the sky is suddenly filled with exploding cows and Peri asks for her help to find the Doctor when they see that the TARDIS has disappeared.

Toby apologises to the Doctor for mistaking him for an enemy and for his new security measure which means he cannot leave until Albertine returns. He claims that he is indeed a pig from England, although he does not offer any detail, and that he intends to steal the time machine of a man who has come from the future to kill him and use it to prevent the evolution of humanity, which he deems an aberration. The Doctor jumps from the balcony and meets Albertine, who suspects Chardalot of being the assassin. At the hammam, Chardalot reveals that he has deceived Peri and locks her inside before activating the steam, intent on gaining access to the TARDIS.

Part two
Albertine breaks into Chardalot's room and calls Toby to warn him that they have to leave as she believes that Peri has been killed, unwittingly allowing the hidden Chardalot to learn which room Toby is in. She stabs Chardalot several times when he reveals himself and cuts the line with his teeth, but he is unharmed and manages to tie her up before going to Toby's room where he threatens the life of Miss Bultitude. Toby promises to give him anything that he wants in return for help restoring the world to one run by pigs as he has seen in a film, something which Chardalot dismisses as a fantasy. He tells Toby that he grew him in a bell jar in Vienna as part of an experiment to augment an animal's intellect to the level of a human, but Toby escaped to England in a cattle truck.

The Doctor saves Peri from the hammam and they search Chardalot's room where they find his diary and Albertine, whom they release. They are too late to stop Chardalot from taking Toby and Miss Bultitude, but Albertine uses an advanced telescope in Toby's possession to spot them heading for the train to Brussels. As they drive after the train, Peri reads in Chardalot's diary about experiments on pigs named Toby and Charlie, the latter of whom is described as more violent, and notices that the dates are from fifty years ago despite Chardalot looking like he is in his forties. A screen lights up on the bookmark and shows the presence of a time machine in Brussels.

A temporal fission grenade set by Chardalot to detonate when the car reached a certain temperature begins its countdown and Albertine throws it away, accidentally killing several cows which are sent back in time several hours. The train stops when Miss Bultitude pulls a communication cord because of the explosion and the Doctor sends Peri and Albertine to find the time machine, soon detecting a second one, whilst he boards the train. The Doctor reveals that the inspector is actually Charlie and that he mistakenly believes that he is Chardalot, the time travelling scientist who created him and Toby and is likely dead. Toby throws Chardalot from the train, but he survives thanks to a device resembling a fob watch which allows him limited movement through time and space.

Peri and Albertine arrive at the Hotel Metropol and find Chardalot already there, planning on using the TARDIS to get to the planet Guermantes from which he believes he comes once the Doctor, Toby and Miss Bultitude arrive from the train station by taxi. Injured by the fall from the train, he has his butler, a "rough sketch" of a sapient pig, perform surgery on him and Albertine notices that his memories of his parents are the same as Toby's and his organs are not human. The Doctor, Toby and Miss Bultitude arrive sooner than expected and Toby finds a book depicting two pigs waving goodbye to two piglets, the scene that both of them remember but which never happened; both have taken their memories from books and Guermantes is actually the name of a family from À la recherche du temps perdu.

Chardalot agrees to allow the Doctor and Albertine to perform his surgery and, afterwards, decides to apply for a position with the police. Toby and Albertine move in with Miss Bultitude in England and the Doctor and Peri stay for a while, the former finishing reading À la recherche du temps perdu before agreeing with Peri that it is time for them to leave. He leaves the final volume, Time Regained, behind. Toby eats it.

Cast

 * The Doctor - Colin Baker
 * Peri Brown - Nicola Bryant
 * Nurse Albertine - Adjoa Andoh
 * Toby the Sapient Pig - Paul Brooke
 * Inspector Chardalot - Michael Keating
 * Miss Alice Bultitude - Maureen O'Brien

Crew

 * Cover Art - Stuart Manning
 * Director - Gary Russell
 * Music - Andy Hardwick
 * Producers - Gary Russell and Jason Haigh-Ellery
 * Sound Design - Gareth Jenkins
 * Writer - Matthew Sweet

Worldbuilding

 * Albertine reports that the junior dean of St Cedd's has died quietly home.
 * Cardinal Taschen has died of internal haemorrhage at the altar rail.
 * Mrs Lillian Washbourne, an American stage actress, has died in a fire at the Cecil Hotel, for which Albertine expects the British Asbestic Plaster Company to be taken to court.
 * Toby and Albertine saw Mrs Washbourne perform at the Woods Theatre in Cincinnati.
 * Albertine sees a Punch and Judy man setting up.
 * Lafayette is a confidence trickster.
 * Peri decides to send a postcard to H. G. Wells.
 * Hamish Legg claims to be clairvoyant and goes by "Professor Osiris".
 * Albertine asks Toby whether they should go to Eastbourne or Brighton.
 * Miss Bultitude recommends that the Doctor drink brandy.
 * The Doctor once saw a rhesus macaque bite the Bishop of Winchester and steal his umbrella.
 * Dr Beaker examines Chardalot.
 * Martin Dumollard was a murderer known as the Vampire of Paris.
 * The Doctor and Chardalot drink port.
 * Miss Bultitude euphemistically refers to gay men as "unspeakables of the Oscar Wilde sort".
 * Miss Bultitude followed Toby from Paris to Brussels to Antwerp before arriving in Ostend.
 * Toby considers Hippolyte Fuller-Love to be the worst agent in Europe.
 * Toby used to wear a dog collar.
 * Toby has written his memoirs, which Miss Bultitude has the first editions of inscribed by Fuller-Love.
 * The first night of Toby's European tour was in the Winter Gardens in Berlin in 1888.
 * Albertine's father was from the Isle of Thanet, which Albertine has never visited but thinks sounds romantic.
 * Albertine's father was "mad" for beef tea.
 * The name "Bovril" comes from a book.
 * Peri sarcastically says that she does not need a recorded message from Michael J. Fox.
 * Miss Bultitude has spoken to Jo-Jo the Dog-Faced Boy, the Lobster-Claw Lady, Krao the Missing Link and Chang Wu Gow, the Chinese giant.
 * Chang Wu Gow retired to Bournemouth where he opened a tea room.
 * In the opening chapter of The Woman in White, an Italian professor is saved from drowning.
 * Tom Norman was Toby's first manager. He smoked cheap cigars.
 * Toby says that his terms with Mr Norman meant that he earnt a larger split of the profits than Lillie Langtry.
 * Julia Pastrana was known as the Baboon Lady. She could dance the Highland Fling.
 * Miss Bultitude has researched Equus the Calculating Horse and Simia the Missing Link.
 * Toby's rooms were used for a cousin of the King of the Belgians as he suffered from neurasthenia.
 * Albertine's teacher was taught by Mary Seacole.
 * Toby wears a toupée.
 * Freud, Schopenhauer, Nietzsche and Strindberg were working in Vienna in 1903. Toby claims they were pigs.
 * Strindberg went in search of the philosopher's stone.
 * Sir Henry Irving played the title role in Hamlet.
 * Colonel Dreyfus was part of a scandal.
 * Miss Bultitude's stepfather bought her a taxidermied python and mongoose.
 * Toby has never worn a fez.
 * In college, Peri knew a girl with an eating disorder.
 * Toby has a copy of The Secret Agent and claims that its author, Conrad, was a pig.
 * Toby claims that Shakespeare, Milton, Little Tich and George Eliot were pigs.
 * Peri is familiar with The Railway Children.
 * In the mid-25th century, Earth is flooded with X-ray spectacles created in an accident at a plastics factory involving a matter synthesiser and a collection of Power Man and Iron Fist. Sea monkeys destroyed the factory in a rampage.
 * The Doctor's favourite tailor is on Kolpasha.
 * Miss Bultitude enjoyed Rescued by Rover.
 * Peri and Albertine sight a statue of a little boy peeing.
 * The Doctor once visited Brussels to buy an engagement ring.
 * Toby liked playing with a kaleidoscope.

Continuity

 * The Doctor recalls Peri's transformation into an avian life form on Varos in the late 23rd century. (TV: Vengeance on Varos)
 * The Doctor threatens to tell Peri the story about "the Giant Rat of the River Fleet". (TV: The Talons of Weng-Chiang)
 * The Doctor opines on the reading habits of some of his previous incarnations. He calls the First Doctor the "real Francophile" (TV: The Reign of Terror) and a person who, like him, had a great appreciation for books — but not much time to do it, considering the mire beasts (TV: The Chase) and Moroks (TV: The Space Museum) that he had to face.
 * Peri says that she is going to shop for a postcard to send to H. G. Wells. (TV: Timelash)
 * The Doctor tells Peri that his fifth incarnation "was fond of a Boy's Own adventure about an aristocrat who yomped through the Brazilian rain forests, depriving the natives of their orchids." (TV: Black Orchid)
 * The Doctor mentions that he has met the "odd anthropomorphic slug". (TV: The Twin Dilemma)
 * The Tenth Doctor and Martha Jones would visit 1913 in TV: Human Nature / The Family of Blood.