Beige Planet Mars (novel)

Beige Planet Mars is the sixteenth Virgin Bernice Summerfield New Adventures novel. It features Bernice Summerfield and Jason Kane. This is the first novel to feature excerpts of Jason Kane's xenopornography literature based on his experiences first mentioned in Death and Diplomacy.

Publisher's summary
"Professor Summerfield, your very presence here has raised this hotel's insurance premiums by seven point two percent."

It is the year 2595. Mars, once the distant target of humanity's ambitions in space, has been colonised for five hundred years. To mark the anniversary, the planet's university is holding an academic conference. Naturally, esteemed expert on Martian archaeology Bernice Summerfield is invited to present a paper based on her long career in this field.

But other matters distract Bernice from academia. Decades ago, hostile aliens invaded Mars. At their moment of greatest need, Mars' human population was betrayed by its leader. And although the occupation was swiftly ended, the anger of those who fought to save Mars still runs deep.

So when a veteran of the war is found dead, old wounds are reopened. Bernice finds herself investigating a murder with the least reliable of allies — and soon discovers that the consequences of the Siege of Mars are far from being ancient history.

Plot
to be added

Characters

 * Bernice Summerfield
 * Jason Kane
 * Professor Megali Scoblow
 * Isaac Deniken
 * Skeez & Scoaz
 * Professor Elizabeth K. Trinity/Karina Tellassar
 * Gerald Makhno
 * Phillip York & Christina York
 * Saldaamir

Botany

 * According to Jason, Professor Scoblow's tail smells of wood shavings.

Corporations

 * Christina and Phillip York own YorkCorp (which owns most of Mars), but were facing a hostile takeover by the Bantu Corporation.

Foods and beverages

 * Benny and Isaac drink RedStar (Martian Vodka).

Individuals

 * Bernice Summerfield has sex with Jason.
 * Benny knows how to dive.
 * The last time Benny was on Mars was when she was twenty-four with a guy named Tim.
 * Jason Kane has sex with while he's at the hotel. He has been having sex with Professor Scoblow for a little while.
 * Professor Megali Scoblow is a Pakhar. Her original Pakhar name was Sk'o'bel'ou.
 * When Benny attends the opening parts of the conference, there is a reference to the Fourth Doctor, Romana II and K9: "She (Benny) negotiated her way past a curly-haired man, his blonde companion and their robot dog."
 * Professor Elizabeth K. Trinity/Karina Tellassar is a very spry eighty year old.
 * Tellassar is hated among veterans from the Daleks' attack as the betrayer of Mars.
 * Gerald Makhno is a fan of Bernice Summerfield's work. He would like to (but doesn't) shag Benny.

Literature

 * This is the debut of Jason Kane's xenopornography.
 * Nights of the Perfumed Tentacle By Jason Kane


 * Benny's sequel to Down Among the Dead Men is still called So Vast a Pile.
 * Professor Elizabeth K. Trinity is a professor and writer of books about Mars, in particular A History of Mars (which Benny claims the author "treats her readers like morons").

Planets

 * Isaac Deniken asks Benny about Tyler's Folly, as he spent some time there.

Species

 * Xlanthi are mentioned (in great detail); however the only one that actually appears turns out to be a guy in a high tech suit.
 * Trinity asks Benny about the Argyre Clan. The nuclear explosion which wiped them out is also mentioned.
 * Jeff Mett was killed by a Chelonian pilot smuggling drugs for genetic disorders. Scoblow and Trinity met on the ice plains of Prashant to discuss Chelonian floral culture.

Titles and offices

 * Professor Scoblow is Emeritus Professor of Human History at the Santa Diana University on Mars.

Continuity

 * Jason was a prostitute (among other things) before he met Benny in PROSE: Death and Diplomacy.
 * Tyler's Folly appeared in PROSE: Down.
 * Pakhars first appeared in PROSE: Legacy.
 * The first stages of the Dalek's invasion of Mars were seen in PROSE: GodEngine.
 * The Argyre Clan and the nuclear explosion, and how Benny knows so much about both (because she was around for most of it), is mentioned in PROSE: The Dying Days.
 * Tim (Benny's friend) was first mentioned in PROSE: Lucifer Rising.