Iris Wildthyme and the Unholy Ghost (short story)

Iris Wildthyme and the Unholy Ghost was the first story in the anthology The Panda Book of Horror. It was written by Ian Potter.

Plot
After an introduction by an omniscient narrator, the Celestial Omnibus comes out of the Maelstrom, arriving at a stormy cathedral in the middle of the night. A verger comes out in the downpour, claiming that the cathedral is haunted. Iris and Panda welcome the verger aboard the bus, so he can spend the night there.

In the morning, Iris, Panda, and the verger talk over breakfast, learning about each other and the cathedral. The verger decides to give Iris and Panda a tour of the cathedral, to which Iris and Panda agree. On the tour, Iris and Panda note how ugly and mismatched the cathedral is. The cathedral's bishop tells Iris, Panda, and the verger that certain parts of the cathedral are closed, due to them being fuly booked. He tells them that he is holding a meeting with Soroptimists. He then dramatically leaves.

With no other place to really go, the verger leads Iris and Panda to the gift shop, where they group reads a book about the hauntings of the cathedral. After reading about the questionable stories, they hear a scream from the bishop, which they go off to investigate.

When they reach the room where the bishop is giving his presentation, they see that a spectre is ghoulishly menacing at the the bishop and the Soroptimists. The ghoul then dissipates. Iris then finds the room is full of static electricity, and she figures out that all of the hauntings in the book that the verger had read were in fact the same haunting, but the pattern is only getting stronger as time goes on.

Hours later, the trio head down into the cathedral's crypt, where they find a tomb. The verger opens the tomb, to find a humanoid corpse covered in a dried, blood-like substance. Iris tastes it, and she determines that it's not blood, but some sort of iron crust. A creature appears behind them, not unlike the one that taunted the bishop. It tells them to stop interfering, which Iris completely ignores. It scampers, leaving some fabric behind, which Iris knows shouldn't exist until thirty years in the future.

Characters

 * Iris Wildthyme
 * Panda
 * Narrator
 * Verger
 * Bishop

Continuity

 * Iris is travelling with Panda. (AUDIO: Wildthyme at Large, et al)