The Pirate Planet (novelisation)

 by James Goss was the novelisation of the TV story of the same name written by Douglas Adams.

Back cover
'Yes, it was the supreme fragment of the precious universe, yes, it could restore the balance between good and evil in this one, but really ... did there have to be six pieces of it?'

Inside front cover

 * The classic DOCTOR WHO adventure by Douglas Adams, novelized by James Goss.

The hugely powerful Key to Time has been split into six segments, all of which have been disguised and hidden throughout time and space. Now the even more powerful White Guardian wants the Doctor to find the pieces.

With the first segment successfully retrieved, the Doctor, Romana and K-9 trace the second segment of the Key to the planet Calufrax. But when they arrive at exactly the right point in space, they find themselves on exactly the wrong planet – Zanak.

Ruled by the mysterious "Captain", Zanak is a happy and prosperous planet. Mostly. If the mines run out of valuable minerals and gems then the Captain merely announces a New Golden Age and they fill up again. It's an economic miracle – so obviously something's very wrong...

Paperback
Aboard the TARDIS: The Doctor, Romana, and K-9 scour the galaxy in search of six seemingly lost pieces of the incredibly powerful Key to Time.

They soon locate a fragment in the outer reaches of the universe on the happy and prosperous planet of Zanak. Once outside, however, they quickly realise they're in the wrong place at exactly the right time.

The planet is entering yet another New Golden Age with enough gems and minerals for every residents. So, obviously, something is very, very wrong.

Part One

 * 1) The Sky with Diamonds
 * 2) The Dead Planets
 * 3) Life Force
 * 4) Have You Ever Seen an Arcturan Mega-Chicken?
 * 5) Mourning Sickness
 * 6) That New Planet Smell
 * 7) Has Anyone Seen Calufrax?
 * 8) There Are No Other Worlds

Part Two

 * 1) The 5,000-Mile Teacup
 * 2) The Kings of Alderbaran III Make a Decision
 * 3) The Fastest Corridor
 * 4) The Astromobile Association'
 * 5) Try Not to Think of Anything Annoying
 * 6) The Waters of Calufrax

Part Three

 * 1) Bad Omens
 * 2) Guilt Futures
 * 3) Nothing Like a Plan
 * 4) The Sky Demon Can Wait
 * 5) Memento Mori
 * 6) Dog Fight
 * 7) A Leap of Faith

Part Four

 * 1) Journey to the Centre of the Earth
 * 2) Playing the Queen
 * 3) Small Print Is Not for Eternity
 * 4) Newton's Revenge
 * 5) A Spanner in the Works
 * 6) Mr Fibuli Gets His Wish
 * 7) The Heart of Zanak
 * 8) The Captain's Plan

Characters

 * Fourth Doctor

rest to be added
 * Romana I
 * K9
 * The Captain
 * Mr Fibuli
 * Xanxia
 * Kimus
 * Mula
 * Pralix
 * White Guardian

Deviations from televised story

 * The novel repeatedly states that this is Romana's second day and second trip in the TARDIS.
 * The Nurse wears a pale green dress rather than a white one.
 * The Captain has a beard, half of which is robotic. His backstory is explained, including that he has been on Zanak for 200 years.
 * It's hinted that the Black Guardian is behind some events, including saving the Captain from dying when the Vantarialis crashed.
 * Calufrax, in the Calufrax system with six other planets, has two suns.
 * The Doctor, Romana, and Kimus are tortured in the Knowhere.
 * Rather than being a hologram, the Doctor actually walks the plank and is saved by Romana in the TARDIS materialising around him as he falls.
 * As he's falling, the Doctor imagines the Dalek Supreme and the Cyber-Controller being notified of how he died via the space-time telegraph.
 * It is said that Zanak has destroyed "dozens of planets" and a "dozen dozen" planets.
 * Xanxia purchased her time dams from a corporation that the Time Lords shut down 500 years ago, indicating that she has lived at least that long.
 * The young and old Queen Xanxias meet briefly.
 * Earth watches the effects of Zanak trying to materialise around the planet.
 * Rather than bouncing Calufrax into the vortex to retrieve later, it reconfigures itself into the segment, attached to the tracer.
 * The Doctor and Romana go back in time and visit Calufrax to pay their respects just before Zanak arrives.
 * As the TARDIS is repairing itself, the console room becomes an English garden with a conservatory, the control console appearing as a sundial.

Continuity

 * The Doctor mentions having been assigned by the Guardian the task of collecting the six parts of the Key to Time. So far, he has only found one. (TV: The Ribos Operation)
 * The Doctor recalls fighting a Giant Prawn (TV: The Invisible Enemy)
 * The Knowhere conjures a Dalek to face the Doctor and Romana, who has never seen one in real life, but will later. (AUDIO: The Dalek Contract)
 * The Doctor recalls saving people from a Dalek mine in Bedfordshire. (TV: The Dalek Invasion of Earth)
 * The Doctor claims no one invades Gallifrey because it's too boring, but the Sontarans and Vardans already have. (TV: The Invasion of Time)
 * The White Guardian is aware of what and where the remaining segments of the Key to Time are, and is simply letting the Doctor do the work so he doesn't have to. (TV: The Stones of Blood, The Androids of Tara, The Power of Kroll, The Armageddon Factor)

Editions published outside Britain

 * Published in Germany by Cross Cult in 2017 as a paperback edition, translated by Andrea Blendl and published as Der Piratenplanet, it was one of five books published by them in the 2010's.
 * Published in Italy by Mondadori in 2017 as a paperback edition, translated by Alessandro Vezzoli and published as Pianeta Pirata, it was one of three books published by them in the 2010's.
 * Published in the Czech Republic by Argo in 2018 as a hardback edition, translated by Pavel Cernovsky and published as Piratska Planeta, it was one of three novelisations published in the 2010's.

Audiobook
This novel was released on 5 January 2017 complete and unabridged by BBC Audio and read by Jon Culshaw.

The cover blurb and thumbnail illustrations were retained in the accompanying booklet with sleevenotes by David J. Howe. Music and sound effects by Simon Power.