One Born Every Minute (TV story)

One Born Every Minute was a comedy sketch broadcast on 15 March 2013 during that year's Comic Relief fund-raiser. It parodied the documentary series One Born Every Minute and the BBC dramas Call the Midwife and Doctor Who.

Synopsis
Dawn is about to give birth but calling the midwife has strange consequences.

Plot
A couple about to give birth in a modern British hospital call for a midwife on the intercom in their hospital room. Several characters from Call the Midwife enter, replete with "reassuring 1950s speak" and post-war advice on how to give birth. Dissatisfied, the expectant parents try their intercom another time, now requesting a Doctor. The TARDIS materialises and out pops the Eleventh Doctor with the dire warning that the couple's twins, Jonathan and Edward, will one day grow up to be the most frightening creature imaginable: Jedward. Horrified, the midwives ask the Doctor to take them back to the 1950s.

Cast

 * Dawn - Margaret Cabourn-Smith
 * Expectant father - Dan Mersh
 * Sister Evangelina - Pam Ferris
 * "Chummy" Brown - Miranda Hart
 * Jenny Lee - Jessica Raine
 * "Trixie" Franklin - Helen George
 * Cynthia Miller - Bryony Hannah
 * Sister Julienne - Jenny Agutter
 * Narrator - Vanessa Redgrave
 * Modern nurse - unknown
 * Eleventh Doctor - Matt Smith

Crew
to be added

Worldbuilding

 * Strictly Come Dancing is also referred to, but described only as "Strictly".
 * A joke is made about Bruce Forsyth's longevity on British television.

Story notes

 * Smith recorded his portion of the skit on 18th December 2012, whereas the Call the Midwife cast recorded their part at a later date.